First Annual McGurk Olympics

The 'First Annual McGurk Olympics' were held over Turkey Day weekend. Germany, Russia, Scotland and Yemen were all honorably represented...although everyone agreed that Scotland's uniforms kicked the most ass (even if they didn't say it out loud). The Yemen...um, Yemeneese...Yemenites...ok, Kindra and JJ did a
great freaking job of setting everything up. There was an Olympic torch (harvest candle), numerous events and a great deal of trash-talk. It was one of those goofy afternoons that you would see on the 'Brady Bunch', and it was a blast...call me old-fashioned if you want to, but you know deep down, in places you don't want to talk about...that you want to be on that wall.

Scotland jumped out to an early lead in the 'Lawn Bowling' event, but struggled until much later in the afternoon. Yemen came back strong in the 'Balloon Toss', where most teams were just happy to get through the event without taking an early shower. Here, the Commies demonstrate their 'far left' balloon throwing
technique. If you look closely, you can see the balloon about to burst on Julia...and even though she did manage to avoid getting soaked, I did douse her with an extra balloon a short time later...and she promptly got me back while I was picking up pieces of the popped balloons and protecting the environment...further proof that Commies hate hippies.

Deutschland came back strong when the games moved back inside. The Fear Factor-esk 'Eating Game' was a little rough on everyone. Admittedly, worms (gummie) and mush (baby food) aren't that hard to force down, but finishing it all off by chewing on a lemon that takes the coffee stains off your teeth did turn some stomachs. Here, Mom struggles to dominate her portion of gefilte fish (you know, a ground deboned fish recipe using a variety of kosher fish meat that is then made into fish loaves or balls...balls that look a lot like deer turds. Generally, those of us from the Tribe eat gefilte fish to avoid "borer" (selection/choosing)...you know, one of the 39 categories of activity prohibited on Shabbat derived from the Torah as outlined in the Mishnah...seriously people this is common knowledge...'goyim' my ass).

The final event was the 'Obstacle Course'. One team member was blind folded while the other had to verbally give instruction on how to navigate the course. Generally, this worked out well...unless my...err, 'your' teammate was laughing so hard that instructions were limited to squeaks and "go forward until you run into the tree". The Russians used their uncanny Commie-communication skills to finish just ahead of Yemen in the event and take the gold medal in the First Annual McGurk Olympics. Here, JJ demonstrates his 'drag-queen cone navigation' technique...he is one sexy beyatch ain't he?!

It was a hell of a day, and we're already looking forward next year.